Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
祝我早点找回上海的工作，我要回家，我要回家。
生硬直白的不像pixar，转折来的尴尬且突如其来，所有的角色都是围绕主角成长的工具人，把《包宝宝》的故事无意义延长，就挺没劲的
《爱情神话》不是费里尼最具代表性的作品，它的内容与片名有着一定的距离，以致于看前是抱着去见证一段神话而看后则会对所谓的神话不明所以：这和本片的故事线是贴合的，上海人之间的感情—精致的外表，品质的生活，精神的富饶，就像弄堂里的老复式洋房，就像老上海本帮菜的调味，就像那些刻在上海人骨子里的考究的形式主义…很难定义。完全可以说本片是很久以来最上海情调的影片没有之一，虽然这里面一点上海地标性的建筑都没有，但满满的SH properties。其实在上海这些闹中取静的地方是最适合谱写浪漫、传奇的爱情故事的，我曾经和一个北京人在这儿谱写过，后来这个人去了蒙特利尔，而我就是在蒙特利尔的一家艺术影院看了费里尼的《爱情神话》。
爱情神话，虽然是对老电影的引用，但更主要像个免责声明。真实生活如此沉重，你就允许我在电影里飞一把吧。能接受电影里的特工穿过枪林弹雨而毫发无伤，为何不能接受电影里的普通人能够富足、相爱、拥有一生的朋友，你不相信也行，我都说了是神话了。导演放低姿态的自嘲、谁都不得罪的小心翼翼可能不必。老乌是真实的（影子）男主，爱情神话的真实持有者，用自己的一生携带它，最后终于捧到所有人面前，然后死去。导演很年轻，这种题材如果往扎实地气的方向去做，对于导演肯定是超纲的，导演已经尽最大努力发挥自己并不那么充足的“上海经验”，其余用审美与想像力补足，亦实亦虚的处理，既是讨巧，也是扬长避短。就像Gloria不肯花两万五救老公，却肯花两万五“嫖”老白，导演并不完全坐实任何一段人物背景。这其实挺好，先不被捆住手脚比较重要。
很适合找个假期约三五好友窝在家里一起看 最大的败笔大概就是小爱豆吧
剧作里营建了一个很有意思的上海城市空间，这个空间是纯中产的，也是纯世俗的。没有任何东西是神圣化的，也没有任何东西是尖锐的。这部片子是如此地中产阶级趣味，以至于它不需要其它什么指涉，就可以成为近年来，对上海城市风情描述最佳的神片。
太喜欢了，看片名以为是爱情片，结果竟是女性群像，完全反套路，无雌竞，中年人的关系被拍得又嗲又灵。
文本最入木三分的提炼是父亲角色在被父权催化扭曲的母女关系中主动隐身的描写，他面对「女人问题」的禁忌退避三舍的模样，仿佛看到无数男性终生视异性生理问题为洪水猛兽的集体病症。红色熊猫的家族血缘诅咒隐喻青春期月经羞耻和性欲萌动，少言寡语操持家事的父亲默默回避幕后变成某种支持结构，而自身未能和解代际撕扯的母亲将累加的怨怼投射外化成怪兽类型电影中穷凶极恶的反角。丑陋的中式家庭纽带是移居海外都不会改色的土壤，正如面对市场选择仍未舍弃的刻板东方文化符号，处于复杂流动传统和当下夹缝中的亚裔群体又该如何以一场「封印仪式」和体内剧烈拉锯的两个灵魂休战？与怪物共生从来不是恐惧的缘起，问题出在命名情绪和欲望为凶煞的遗传系统，由此变身设定也不仅是为东亚家庭量身定制的诊断疗愈，自有「异类」规训枷锁下解放再造的普世意义。
我觉得不像是一部电影倒像是小品集，谈不上艺术性顶多就是一种挺特别的拿捏，是写给上海这个城市的一封并不想正经交往的情书，玩一玩乐一乐就够了。前半部分还算吸引人但因为没有内核的东西看到后面就觉得像吃多了的奶油开始起腻了。像修鞋匠还自磨咖啡的这种表达，我觉得属于艺术源自生活但着实高过生活就显得刻意和造作了。作为一个沪漂六七年的导演处女秀，远没有挖掘出上海人骨子里的那种劲儿，三个女人演到最后成了一个劲儿，这劲儿就有点不对了。
骨子里的小资是装不出来的，装出来的是没有这种属于小资的自信的。
不过从这片子本身来看，着实可以咂摸出些滋味，一群人到中年的上海土著，要么有收租的房子要么有拼了二十年的事业，在一种什么都不缺的条件下，有得是半辈子的经历，去考量他们所要的爱情是浪漫还是实际，这比所有小青年搞那些撕心裂肺虚情假意可有意思多了。
非常喜欢老乌这个角色，一位老克勒的不符合年龄的荒诞浪漫主义，充斥着天真纯洁光怪陆离的幻想的爱情，以及对艺术的顽固的执着。他格格不入地混入了这个无比真实的现实社会，最后以近乎“殉情”的方式结束一生，死后还得知他的房子居然是匿名人士提供其免费居住的，关于他的一切都如此荒诞神秘奇妙无比，真真假假假假真真，已不重要。
要是背景乐能少一点，修鞋匠没有这么神叨叨的，Gloria没有关上门后那一刻的黯然神伤，李小姐和白老师就这么算了，那我愿意给5颗星。
电影很诙谐也很现实地提醒我们，人间烟火气是有门槛的，它要么是一技之长，要么是履历和财富，要么是身份层面的国际化，要么就是姿色本身。总之有了这些，人才能心安理得地约暧昧对象喝咖啡，嗑着瓜子看费里尼，还把穿坏的Jimmy Choo当成淘宝货。在物质生活不断发展，精神文明却愈发模糊和难以定义的今天，片中的上海用她特有的文化自信给我们指了一条切实的明路。
结尾处大家为了纪念老乌强忍无聊看《爱情神话》，被白老师的“去准备些点心”打破尴尬，真是白老师的高光时刻，我要是李小姐，我也明天下午约他喝杯咖啡。中年爱情，终于走出刘涛靳东们的精英化了。
把最佳男配角奖发给周野芒！一个老白，一个老乌代表了两种上海老男人，前者是小资闷骚，后者是爱兜牛逼装金刚钻的明骚，“上海这个地方现在我算外人了我蹲不下去了”一句玩笑话居然让我最能relate。全程沪语的生活流现在轻松惬意，值得把玩的小细节也不少。两个妈妈演员的数落孩子戏份真的和我妈也差不多。但是说带头，人到中老年能出去耍朋友，是不是还是因为侬有几套老房子？
是跨年不错的爱情小品，上海文艺片，tag和标签，上海、中年、离婚、重组。最喜欢“野猫和剩饭”这个桥段。
骨子里是大型的情景喜剧，妙在剧本、 对白、演员的拿捏。剧中的语音很罕见的是生活的语言。但这剧的成功和矛盾都在与此。因为完完全全是虚构的人物和场景。没有一个年届50的中年艺术男会住在这样的弄堂里（我的家人依然还有住在那样地方的），更别说展开浪漫了。一方面人为的感觉很强烈，另一方面又带来了久违的喜剧张力。导演似乎很乐意把自己定位在这里（而不是任何艺术高度，影片里有好几处这样的机会）。公允地说，我觉得片子很成功，让我放声大笑。最后，配乐太糟糕了。
有某种稀缺性，演得“灵啊灵啊”。但就像出字幕时白老师和李小姐一路语带双关的微信对话，挺鲜活也有意思，但就是显得装腔作势，显得矫情，显得洋泾浜。
本来就是个看起来很舒服的中老年爱情轻喜剧，非要学别人上什么女性意识觉醒的价值。所谓的女性意识就是两句对话剧的表面批判，就是雌竟的女人们最终成为了朋友，就是独立帅气的女孩子喜欢上阴柔气息的男孩子，对不起，我们看不上那种妈宝幼稚男。
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